(Source: jenfakatie)
I’ve been so tied down with homework and staying busy, though.
Week 1 of my diet went well.. I went to the gym a couple times, started off slowly and eased my way into things so I didn’t overwhelm myself (as I originally planned.)
Week 2-current, not so good. I’ll just come out and say it.. I didn’t really stick to the meal plan that I had set out to. I ate the stuff that I bought for it, but didn’t do it on the exact days. Lately, I’ve been eating once a day and trying to keep it at a minimum. I have been eating healthier, but I haven’t restricted myself to solely that and I’m kind of disappointed in myself. I went to the gym last week, weighed myself and I do not like the number that I see whatsoever. Lately, I feel tempted to start binging & purging again. I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me. Boyfriend and I smoked some last night, and I got high and told him that I was thinking about going back to my past ways of being bulimic. He asked if it’s something that you can just turn on and off, it’s not.. I just feel like I want to lose weight and it’s really hard not to go back to that. I just wish there was someone I could talk to that would understand where I’m coming from and I wouldn’t have to tell random people about what’s going on in my head. I just feel like if I tell any of my friends, they’re going to be disappointed or try to talk me down from it. I don’t want anyone to save me or think that I’m wanting attention. I’m happy with my life and I love the people in it, I just want to be happy with myself so the entire picture is complete.
(Source: tellmeyourfantasies)
(Source: killingmyskeletons)
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(Source: workhardergofarther)
(Source: brynja-bjork)
(Source: sing-me-insomnia)
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